This topic is not exactly black and white (to my current understanding at least). There are numerous, differing opinions and perspectives I’ve noticed. It may be because we all have varying bodies, body shapes, sizes, etc. allowing some to wear specific articles of clothing that others may be too revealing in, or swallowed-up-looking in, LOL!
Also, how we’ve been brought up can have an immense impact on the way we perceive what is acceptable in public and what isn’t so much. We also should be careful to pursue physical modesty as far as our hearts are ready for; our insides need molded and refined first, then the outside should genuinely follow it. I say this because I feel it’s important to YHWH for us to have the right intentions, and to consistently ask for His leading and convictions.
This post is solely to share what I feel YHWH has shown me about modesty and what I believe it entails to Him. I desire this post to encourage and help anyone who is looking into modesty, and to pursue it with much communing with our very own Creator. This is by no means pressuring others to believe how I feel I should dress, behave, or look.
Define Modesty
Hebrew 6038 `anavah an-aw-vaw’ from 6035; human and subjective (modesty), or divine and objective (clemency):–gentleness, humility, meekness.
Greek 127. aidos ahee-doce’ perhaps from 1 (as a negative particle) and 1492 (through the idea of downcast eyes); bashfulness, i.e. (towards men), modesty or (towards God) awe:–reverence, shamefacedness.
Greek 5012. tapeinophrosune tap-i-nof-ros-oo’-nay from a compound of 5011 and the base of 5424; humiliation of mind, i.e. modesty:–humbleness of mind, humility (of mind, loneliness (of mind).
- the quality of being relatively moderate, limited, or small in amount, rate, or level.
- -“the modesty of his political aspirations”
- Similar: limited scope, moderation, fairness, acceptability, smallness
- behavior, manner, or appearance intended to avoid impropriety or indecency.
- plural noun: modesties -“modesty forbade her to undress in front of so many people”
Scripture that Comes to Mind:
…I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, [g]modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or expensive apparel, 10 but rather by means of good works, as is proper for women making a claim to godliness. -1 Timothy 2
19 Don’t you know that your body is a sanctuary of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought at a price. Therefore glorify God in your body.[i] -1 Corinthians 6
- Stumbling Block to Others, Think about them when dressing
- Luke 17:1 (NASB): “He said to His disciples, ‘It is inevitable that stumbling blocks come, but woe to the one through whom they come!'”.
- 1 Corinthians 8:9 (NIV): “Be careful, however, that the exercise of your rights does not become a stumbling block to the weak”.
- Romans 14:13 (NIV): “Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister”.
- Cross-Dressing
- Deuteronomy 22:5 (NASB): A woman shall not wear a man’s clothing, nor shall a man put on a woman’s clothing; for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God.
Overall, modesty is about the heart!
Our intention should not be attention!
What are the motives behind our choices?
Personal Convictions:
The inside reflects the outside.
The W.W.W.W.H. of Modesty
1. WHO
- am I glorifying (when I dress or behave this way)?
- is my main concern?
2. WHAT
- is my intent or purpose in this choice?
- goal do my choices/behaviors fulfill?
3. WHERE
- am I drawing inspiration toward choosing outfits?
4. WHY
- am I doing what I’m doing/how I’m behaving in certain choices from my wardrobe?
5. HOW
- am I presenting/reflecting Messiah in how I dress and carry myself?
- are my decisions affecting others? (Could I be a stumbling block to others in any way?)
Physical Corrections I am TRYING to Follow:
- Thigh, crotch, and butt areas well covered/hidden (if fitted clothing, wear a long cardigan or long shirt over top?)
- skirts and dresses (not form-fitting) preferred, but not against pants that are either loose-fitting or covered by another layer
- ********I feel this was most important to YHWH that these specific areas be hidden (it’s for our own good and protection)
- I aim to have clothes land right below my knees or lower. I find it’s usually okay if my knees show when I sit down.
- Cleavage covered (try moving around a bit in front of a mirror to see what your clothes are doing too! I especially have to do this for the chest area.. i like v-necks a lot lol)
- Another thing, is that I need to ask myself if what I’m wearing draws attention to these areas as well.
- Fit matters! Loose is best (doesn’t have to mean baggy, unless that’s your style!). I can wear sizes small-medium in most tops, but medium-large is what I should wear.
- Hair &/or Make-up not even necessary in my opinion. You can still look presentable without styling your hair and putting products on your already-beautiful face! In the past, I spent hours getting ready: brushing, parting, drying my hair, scrunching or straightening it and applying at least foundation and mascara. Now, I just find so much more value in my time and self-image in simply not doing that anymore. Letting my hair hang dry natural and see it wave beautifully how it was designed to, has brought me so much contentment and appreciation for what I’ve been given. I missed out on this in my youthful years, especially with not feeling comfortable, confident, and grateful in my own skin.
- I’ll do my hair and/or make-up every once in a while for when I go somewhere with my husband. I usually do this for weddings and other similar events as well, but haven’t bothered with it this past year haha.
- Shoes shouldn’t be high heels or wedges. I know this probably sounds ridiculous, but in the past, these types of shoes were originally worn by prostitutes and the like. Also, I learned that the higher the heel was, meant she was higher in price.
Examples from My Closet:
Styling jeans with lengthy layers!
For warmer months:
I throw on long tunic tops/tanks and maybe a thin, long flannel or sleeveless long cardigan. I try my best to cover all or most of my thighs!
This white shirt is actually a maternity shirt that happened to be the only thing, I could find, that I felt was long enough haha
Getting dressy!
I have a knee-length skirt here with leggings underneath. The sweater has bigger holes, so I wear a nude or brown tank underneath as well. I love styling maxi skirts too! I usually wear shorter cardigans and shirts with those.
In the summer, I wear knee-length (or close as possible to knee or longer) athletic skirts with shorts in them, or I wear capri leggings underneath. I also was blessed with an athletic razor-back tank top dress that goes all the way down to my shins! I wear this ALL the time, and usually with a crop zip-up jacket or crop quarter zip.
Oh long dresses… so great.
Any season I can pull out a dress (very plain, casual or dressy) and can add whatever I want to them OR NOTHING! Haha they make things fairly simple!
Best Comfy Pants!
I call these my “M.C. Hammer pants” LOL.
They are so versatile. I can dress them up or keep ’em casual. I style these similar to the pants pictured below.
My favorite “jeans”!
They are baggy enough to not require added coverage (in my mind haha). This is when I wear normal length tops and/or sweaters.
I also recommend long coats or vests! In the winter when I am out and about and know I’m probably not going to take my coat off, I use those as my covering layer! I keep my outfits underneath very simple, light, and plain usually, and it doesn’t even have to match!
Modesty Videos I’ve Learned From:
English